Black Women are Not Bitter
You know what’s annoying? Every time black women speak up on something they are passionate about they are labeled as being “bitter” or “angry”. I don’t get why so many people do this. Is it because you don’t understand my explanation and your solution to not looking dumb is making me look crazy?
A few days ago, I was scrolling through twitter (as always) to find that there was a tweet from a white boy that said “The floor is black women” and he was going out of his way to stand on the counter top. This tweet was a reference to a popular meme where people reference the lava game almost every kid plays. Basically the game is when kids jump on furniture to avoid the ground because “the floor is lava”. It was a popular game to play with my cousins when I was a kid and it was a game a lot of other teenagers played when they were young. The boy’s intention was to say that he disliked black women and would do anything to avoid them.
I was annoyed as I usually am by these comments. I went to his replies to see what other people were saying to him and saw that for the most part it was white, Latino and other men AND women laughing, agreeing or praising him for speaking up against the evil black women. There were a lot of black guys in the comments as well and, while there were a few kings defending black women, I was not surprised to see there were more bashing black women and agreeing with this boy. I was not surprised by this in the slightest. I see it all the time. Black women are almost completely alone in our self defense.
I also saw a tweet about a white girl making her skin dark with makeup and filters on instagram (I did a thread on that on my twitter page @MayatheeMartian) which is blackface and cultural appropriation like I’ve never seen it before. Non black women of color and black men came to her defense saying that black women are jealous that she looks better than us. Another tweet was by a black boy who said : “I can only date Caribbeans and Afro-Latinas not regular black women.”
He clarified and said that he meant he wouldn’t date African-American Women. Before you write this off saying it’s “just Twitter”, remember that these are real people expressing their real thoughts and feeling. There are real people agreeing with them. All of these real live people are living by their toxic ideologies and it often manifests itself in calling darkskin black women roaches, self hatred and other forms of disrespecting African American women. Thus affection REAL black women’s self esteem. There’s no way this disrespect is a result of the internet. It is just more apparent because of the internet.
I say all of this to say that black women are not angry and bitter. We just are always put in a position to defend ourselves. Also, black women are usually the ones to lead the way in times of peril and often come to others defenses as well as communities we co exist in. It’s pride month. Lookup Marsha P. Johnson and read about what she has done for the gay community. Also, black women started Black Lives Matter. Black women have to fight for what we are passionate about. If that’s not enough, we constantly have to defend ourselves against a society that is against us.
SIDE BAR: If you are reading this and you’re not a black woman. Please do not sit up with your nose in the air and say that you never say anything about black women as if that is enough. Especially if you sit silently as the people around you bash us.
“If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor. If an elephant has its foot on the tail of a mouse and you say that you are neutral, the mouse will not appreciate your neutrality.” -Desmond Tutu